It’s 7 in the afternoon and we’re dancing on my rooftop while Fade Into You is playing discreetly in the background. I never thought I’d be able to hear that song and smile… It’s so damn mellow and melancholic, and it always brings back these times when I was sitting on this rooftop, at this very time of the day, all by myself. I never thought that I could be so intimate here, yet, here you are, looking at me with these eyes I have become so drawn in. I ask you if I can play the song one more time and you immediately nod yes while singing the end of the tune. It’s become obvious that you love it as much as I do.
You take a photo of me because you enjoy the loud laughter coming out from the bottom of my lungs, and I chuckle before the first lyric is sang- I sing along, and for the first time, I do it with only a tear of joy. The sadness is gone. You see, everything that’s black in my head completely disappears when you’ laying beside me.
Baby, I have spread my dreams under your feet. You came in a very dark place in my life where I had no hope at all, and somehow made me open my wings wider than ever and dream of the sun once again, when I was only able to see a fully black sky. I love it how you make me laugh, and how I never have to fake a single shriek. I honestly can’t help myself when you’re around. It’s like there’s a rainstorm pouring all over me every time you look at me with your big, completely concentrated at the sound of my voice, adorable eyes.
I’m in love with the way you stare when I sip my coffee or become very much absorbed in my books and thoughts. I would normally hate it if somebody had this big of an effect of me, I have to admit. But baby, I told you, I’m completely defenceless in the pure sight of you, and absolutely paralysed by the way I feel for you.
We talk about art and poetry, and a single line takes whole hours maybe; yet it does not seem amore than a moment’s thought. And oh dear, the only poetry I’ve managed to write is rhyming lines about your face.
You know, I always thought that love eventually will fade away, and that there’ll be a time when I wouldn’t be able to see the stars anymore, that the kisses wouldn’t be as soft, and the embrace much rougher. Afraid that I’d eventually go back to filling my life with pointless things.
But as I look inside the telescope that is a pair of eyes looking back at me, I feel like I finally understand everything as I look deeper and more further. I’m not afraid of what the truth might bring anymore, and I don’t have to lock any door for now. I don’t have to search for anything, because I am looking at everything I’ve been wishing upon the stars for all this time. And whenever you hold me, time doesn’t even feel real anymore. Like the hours on the clock are leaves in the wind, while I never want to leave your side, and every second that’s ticking is worth spent.
Right here and now, I am clean of all my fears and worries. And I can’t help but shout out your name while reaching out for your hand, even if you’re only two feet away. It’s like I don’t even belong to myself anymore — I’m yours.
And all I can think about is that there is no greater, or stronger feeling than this.
Stay right here beside me, and ignore the cold for a bit more. I’d do anything for a little more of this. I’ll even give you the sun back. That’s a lie, actually; I’ll give you the whole universe. I’m not sure if you understand how you fill my days, and even when you get on my nerves, I would still give my all for you.
I need you like a baby needs its mother, for God’s sake! I can’t think of another day full of laughter if you just stop being there. And I cannot tell you how much I hate myself for being so dependent on a person. I,a girl who is the literal definition of independence, funnily enough. But no matter how much that terrifies me, I’d never give up on the emotion of you. It’s too late, after all.
The song is almost over and you reach for my hand while slightly stroking my cheek. I don’t know how it’s even possible to miss someone when they’re standing right beside you. I gift you a final smirk before the cold becomes overwhelming for both of us to handle.
Come on, grab my hand while I guide you to my small room, where we can stare each other until the skies turn black.
Where I so completely and inescapably,
Fade into you.