Okay, so, for the next week I’m apartment hunting, I need to speak with my landlord, I’ve got to write the new article for Pillowfights and the boiler broke down – do I need an electrician or a plumber for this? And I have to pick up my car license at some point and is that my electric bill?! What am I doing, cooking for 5 families?
And then I need to… OH, FUCK.
Dude I just met a month ago, and I can’t stop thinking about, be a doll and get outta my head, will you? I don’t have time for this! This is so not the right time to fall in love, could you please wait until I settle everything else and then come back in, I don’t know, a couple of years from now?
I mean, what is this all about? Why can’t love come on its own scheduled appointment – let’s say, Friday the 13th, around noon? My timetable’s full, my head has to remain focused on a little something called real life – how on a earth am I supposed to enjoy this? Shoo, just go away, I need to be an adult right now, I can’t have birds chirping in my ears most of the day; it’s distracting me.
“And here I would have to say “Pa-ha”! Gosh, girl, haven’t you ever heard about Mr. Arthur Bloch and his book? You know, Murphy’s Law? Of course love’s gonna swoop in your life at the worst possible time, when everything is in disarray – that’s how it always happens. It’s not like Life’s gonna ask you: “Hey darling, is everything set now? Are all your problems solved? Are you ready for me to send you that nice little lad I’ve been keeping for you, so you can enjoy some quality time together?”
Actually, what’s more likely for Life to be saying is: “So your life is a mess, you don’t know where you’ll be living by next month, you have a huge debt to cover and you rotate your friends like a puzzle game in order to see them all? Yup, that’s the thing. Here, see if you can joggle a new boyfriend as well, dear”.
And you will start to lose the fragments of control you had before, trying to manage your time and rearrange your schedule to fit him or her in, as well. And before you know it, parents, companies, friends AND the new addition will be constantly complaining and depriving you of your sleep, because you can’t break into 1000 pieces – and even if you could, someone still wouldn’t be satisfied.
So, yes, if the timing feels so wrong, maybe you should put things like falling in love aside – until everything else is settled, and then you can freely enjoy such feelings and really be there for them. “
“Yeah, right. Just a quick thought, however, before you do that; please, take a look around. When is ever the right time? Does life ever stop being complicated? Do problems ever disappear? Solve one and two others will appear in its stead. It’s a circle.
I know that you’d wish the carbonite freezing thingy from Star Wars was real, so you could put him or her in there for a while, but I got some sad news for you: 1) It isn’t real. 2) Even if it was real, Jabba the Hutt, who owned it, is not exactly a piece of cake to deal with, unless you’re a Jedi -which I very much doubt, or you’d be writing this using the Force right now- and 3) A “while” would end up being forever, because, as I said before, new things will keep coming up until, you know, you die.
But, you know what, that’s fine, Life knows what it’s doing. Because in this specific time when everything else is a mess, instead of seeing your love interest as another burden, you could see them as your secret getaway door. Your moments can be a pillow to rest your head, a nice good sleep once in a while in their arms, before the reality check’s up and dancing in front of you again.
After all, that’s what will happen if the thing you have is real – you two together, back to back, comforting and empowering each other. And it seems to me, that the worst possible timing in each other’s lives could be the best possible timing to see if you two can really hit it off, despite the difficulties and the small amount of time you can share”.
Damn. Okay. He’s right.
Who needs 7 hours of sleep, anyway? And what kind of self-centered, first-world-problem-whining kind of a prick would I be, complaining about how love did not choose the right timing to barge into my life? I’ll just roll up my sleeves and hope that, if this crazy merry-go-round halts at some point, he will still be there waiting to give me a hug. And if he isn’t – oh, well.
I’ll just compensate for the hours of sleep I’m gonna miss until then.