To be honest, we live in an era in which relationships don’t have such a strict context as in the past. Nobody belongs to anyone, loyalty is overrated, and there are many people that prefer other, temporary, solutions more than pure commitment. Compared to the hypocrisy of maintaining a relationship while fooling around with one or more different people, it’s better just to fool around and make use of one-day or one-week stands, according to the mood each time.

Not everyone is this reasonable though. There are still many people who prefer to maintain a relationship, while they keep having fun with others. A thing which is on the one hand natural to happen, but on the other is a big mockery for the side that stays loyal. This particular side has suffered a lot throughout the centuries and there are some barely understandable behavioral examples.

One of them is the “I-am-cool-with-my-significant-other-cheating-on-me” or cheating, as a concept, generally.  They preach that it is no big deal, that nothing lasts forever and that it can happen to anyone, so, why to bother? I can’t say that I don’t agree with some of the aforementioned positions. Yes, we don’t belong to anyone and cheating can occur very easily. However, if you are that prone to temptations, why even start a relationship? Start it when you are full of other sorts of experiences and you want to settle down for a while.

Anyway, we skipped the main context again. Back to the ones who are cool with cheating. Everyone cheats. Fair enough, and what a nice argument, really. But what will happen if, all of a sudden the preacher of eternal coolness becomes the victim of cheating? Most of us stay cool until it knocks on our door.

We may pretend not to care, we may say that it is natural for these things to happen, but when we have true feelings for someone, betrayal hurts. It is so simple after all. If you fall into the trap called love, you don’t forgive cheating. You don’t even forgive a look at another person walking on the street. (Ok, here I exaggerated a bit). Love is a possessing, and possessive, feeling though and it doesn’t allow you to be cold-blooded, even if you want to. It doesn’t matter if your mentality is actually relaxed about cheating. The very moment that you read a text from the other guy or girl, when you see a picture or, even worse, catch them in the act, all your cold-blooded principles will go away.

You came second, you are betrayed, you are even defeated. And this needs a big pair of balls in order to walk away indifferent and be the bigger person to overcome it. If you don’t actually care, then things are easier. But for the ones who haven’t reached that point, it is better to accept that anger and indignation exist as well.

Author: Tina Barbatsalou

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