Relationships. So many topics, so many viewpoints and opinions and no room for us to write them all. Usually, a relationship involves a man and a woman. Both of them have their own qualities, but along the way a lot of things got lost. When I say “things”, I mean values and the understanding of both sides. Both genders have their own needs. Unfortunately, most of the time, the male needs aren’t even considered in the first place.

It has been quite some time now; I see all females posing themselves as the “real thing” without even questioning if that is actually the case. Yes, we’re going to take the existential perspective and say “it is what it is”.

Really? Just like that? You got whatever it takes, simply? Wrong.

You’re not the “real thing”, nor the other thing you’re trying so hard to be called as; you’re not a keeper.

A keeper has a set of ideas, perspectives and a behavior that is unlike anything and everything you’ve ever seen so far. She doesn’t need too many explanations about a lot of things that happen in a relationship, and, most and above all, she has a sense of herself.

And because I know that most females out there still don’t get it, I’ll explain thoroughly.

Rule number one.

A keeper is independent. She does not depend her life, or her mood, around her partner. She has her job, her hobbies, her friends. Even when in a relationship, she doesn’t drop everything to spend all of her with her partner. She knows when to come close, and when it is time to spend some time alone as well.

Rule number two.

A keeper has a voice and an opinion. In fact, these two alone are the reason she’s noticed in the first place. She doesn’t agree with what she hears immediately for the sake of appearing more desirable to others. She will see each and everyone’s position, but she’ll decide based on what she believes – and she won’t be afraid to do so. Why? Because she knows that agreeing with everything being said is not only boring but also lacks confidence.

Rule number three.

A keeper taks care of herself. Her appearance overall, her fitness and her well-being. This isn’t about how much you weigh; it’s about how much self-respect you can provide for yourself. The keeper follows a lifestyle; and she knows that taking care of yourself isn’t an option for you to decide later. You just do it – period.

Rule number four.

A keeper is concerned with the contents of only her own wallet. This means that she’s also independent financially – and by far, she has no interest to be in the guy’s pockets. She knows when to accept a treat or a gift, but at no time does she pose herself as a queen demanding royal treatment. In fact, she reciprocates the treat to her man in a sweet and caring way and doesn’t expect things to be one-sided in this case.

Rule number five.

She knows how to give her man his space. She has the knowledge and the ability to understand that all of us need personal time and space to do our own and favorite things. This increases when we talk about a man. He may go out and see his friends, go to a football game or sit quietly at home playing video games. Guess what – he won’t even have to ask; and she doesn’t understand why he has to ask in the first place.

Rule number six.

She supports her man, always. In good times and in bad times. She cares about how his day went, and what problems he is facing. By far, she is always there when he needs her at all costs.


So tell me now, is it just what it is? Are you going to call yourself a keeper now? Do it; but before you do so think about the last time you made him laugh. Think about the last time you surprised him with the initiative to have sex, or even simply gave him a gift. Think about the last time you had a great conversation, or offered him a massage he so needed after endless hours of work. And finally, think about the last time you said thank you to him and appreciated him while offering a squeezing, long bear-hug and a sweet kiss. 

When was the last time you thought of him before you thought of yourself?

If you never have done any of the above, it’s about time.

And to those of you that do all of the above, I’m offering you my greetings girls; keep it real.

Author: Victoria A. Dimou

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