I always had a problem with anniversaries. I kept wondering what exactly it is that makes people want to celebrate on a specific date a few months or years ago, what is it that makes them want to blissfully get people together and remind them as well that X,Y happened so I’m drinking to this!

It most often is birthdays, the joy of having slipped out of a mothers womb into this world and hey, you made it! Yes you are alive, another year you’re not dead, another year you promise to yourself everything will be very different and nothing will be able to touch you. Something like New Year’s resolutions only much less sexy. I don’t know exactly why I am personally felling extremely awkward around that time of the year, but at least I have a good time when I see at others’ celebrations that certainly something is not the way they have envisioned it. Seeing that everyone especially that day stops pretending that they have it all figured out puts a smile on my face.

When it comes to anniversaries related to interpersonal relationships, ahhhh, I am laughing out loud with the vanity people have. They’ll have rings, they’ll have dinners, they’ll have special occasion sex and all those nice things which will be reserved for that day only. Having succumbed to that tradition myself, I can’t help but wonder, why do you need to do special things that day? For example, why special sex? Why has you everyday life devolved to the point where you need to spice it up only that day?

Why not devote time to your partner the rest of the 364 days, but only cherish them that day?

I can see you frown, which is good because I am getting somewhere.

I may have started with anniversaries, but we know better, I always have an end goal.

And it is the following…

Why do we need to reach a point where celebrating each other’s presence, or own accomplishments needs to be a one-day thing? Suffocating in every day endeavors is something unavoidable, I know. And there is no explanation needed when it comes to how at the end of the day we don’t really feel that special, or sexy, or whatever.

Celebrating memories can be a double edged sword. I would take greater pride in a perfect world of celebrating the failures. For some reason I think of success as something that only happens once in a certain way. To continue being happy you need to be adaptable, to continuously make your happiness with what you have and what you deserve.

To fail is to learn though. Which is why I would say — celebrate the failures, all the break-ups, all the times you were fired from a job or quit, all the times you felt lost and helpless. Because then I would say it is quite certain that those mistakes will not be repeated, or that you won’t end up on your birthday-anniversary thinking how nice it would be if you could enjoy the same perks and festivities all year long and not that not-so-special-after-all damn day.

Author: Michael Poe

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