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After a long, busy day when you are in a really bad mood and you are sitting on your couch, suddenly, someone rings your doorbell. And there he is, he is standing in front of you, holding a bunch of beautiful flowers and he’s giving you a warm, tight hug. There isn’t a particular reason for doing this. How romantic of him, you think and you forget everything.

But, wait a minute…

Why did he pick you flowers? Does he want a favor? Does he want to discuss something important or something that may bother you? Or, even worse, did he cheat on you?

Or, on the other hand, my gentlemen friends, you are feeling stressed and exhausted because of your work’s deadlines and pressure and, then, all of a sudden, there she is – she is coming with your favorite chocolate cake –especially made for you– and with her tender kisses and hugs, she immediately makes you feel better.

But, one second, please. 

Why is she treating you like this? Does she have a purpose behind it? What’s she going to ask you? God knows what she did and she’s acting like this right now!

Good or bad, this is what usually happens when our beloved ones express their affection towards us. We come to think, to suspect, that something malicious is hidden behind their actions and we finally cannot enjoy them. Or am I wrong?

What happens is that almost in all of these cases we desperately keep searching for something to bring us down. Our suspicion has no limits. It’s like there isn’t such a thing as innocence in relationships nowadays. We, on our own, make it feel like we don’t deserve an innocent gesture or some tender expression of affection, simply because all these are meant to “heal” something else in our minds; a fight, a misunderstanding, or even infidelity.

And it doesn’t really matter if our person has never given us a single reason to make us as suspicious as we are with them. Maybe the true problem is that we live in an era when everything must happen to cover up something – mainly bad – else.

Most of us are used to the idea that something bad is hidden behind anything good – and the opposite. How could we then accept a simple affectionate, sweet action of love?

Maybe someone, at one time, had used a kind, gentle gesture in order to fool us about something they did, or coax us into something they wanted us to do. Maybe we are not used in this kind of treatment. But, whatever it is, it really destroys us.

Because, my dears, there is still innocence in our relationships. Differently, they couldn’t stay alive. It really is impossible to live in a happy relationship, one in which there are no actions of affection, care, and romantic gestures or, if there are, to consider them as a purpose that conceals something else.

And this is also one reason that brilliant relationships thrive. Honesty achieves to kill every jot of suspiciousness and each tender action is mainly due to one purpose: real love.

And real love is as innocent as everything ‘real’ around us. So, next time he brings you a flower or she surprises you with affection, just stay there and enjoy it instead of filling your mind with stupid, pointless thoughts at every chance.

Don’t let your past relationships, your past life, and your suspiciousness ruin such actions because there are really few who treat their beloved ones this way.

And I don’t think that they’d come to such a ‘trouble’ for their partner if they had done something terrible and they’d like to atone for it. Because doing something that constantly needs bribery is not really love.

Love is to be able to find ways to please your loved ones, to make them feel special, and to bring a big smile to their faces.

And what else could be more innocent than this?

Author: Tonia Pirtsi

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