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There’s something about those people, maybe it’s that devilish smirk that they parade around the room or maybe it’s those magnetizing eyes that have the magic ability to make you feel like you are the only girl there, but you know we are referring to, the ones we like to call: Players.

The term ‘player’ has developed quite a loose meaning nowadays. Variating between the promiscuous and those who simply have a knack for flirting with anything that moves. But generally, they have a way about them that draws you in, no matter how much you know the game they like to play, and how you repeatedly told yourself that you’re not going to fall for it ever again, you can’t help but do.

We are attracted to their confidence and their ability to command their surroundings, so subtly and swiftly they lure you into their charms and before you know it you are already kissing them in the middle of the club.

Those were the old days though when you were quite new to the game yourself. Now, you want to believe that you know more about how to handle a Player when he or she (because yes darling, girls can play the game too) targets you.

Once initial contact was established, and you managed to restrain from throwing all your cards on the table on the first night, you say that you are going to take control of the game.

You start dating and getting to know each other, keeping a close eye on them but without suffocating them too much (you remember that that’s the mistake you made last time) and you start thinking that maybe you can make something out of this player and actually try and get into a relationship with them.

But wait a minute, how can you believe that a person who enjoys instability will decide to settle down for you? How do you know that there are going to be more dates after this one? What if this is just another game to them? These thoughts start flooding your mind and you’re knocked out of your little cloud of Nirvana and thrown back to the reality of who you are dealing with.

There are no guides on how to protect yourself from the games of a player. Those no-texting-them-first, no-calling-in-the-first-72-hours and no-casual-appearances-at-the-places-they-hang-out rules aren’t enough to phase the modern player anymore and you need to come up with more effective precautions if you’re not going to end up ambushed by them; again.

It’s hard to control yourself when the other has no limits, their flirtation level is miles above yours while you’re just sitting there thinking that if you say something more you’ll just come across as clingy or annoying and they’ll just walk off and leave you there.

The days go by and you’re still steadily dating and you have managed to tame your urge to check their phone and ask them to take you wherever it is they went last night. This was only achieved because you started telling yourself these few simple words every day: ‘I’m not going to get attached too soon. We are just having fun. We’ll see how it goes. There’s no need to rush.’ Few words can work miracles with your impulses and, most importantly, keep your heart safe.

Deep down that’s the reason you are terrified of the notorious players so much, because you’ve heard the tales – and you were also part of some of them – where the ending is only happy for them and never for the common folk. So you do have the responsibility of protecting your heart if you know that there is a great chance that it might break a little in the end.

We take precautions and all the necessary measures to keep things casual. Yes you probably have more feelings invested than the player, but is that necessarily true?

The true beauty of the players lies in the fact that they have no reservations and no expectations. Again, this is some not all, some of them are just plain bastards and there is nothing that can keep you safe from them other than a pepper-spray. But there are others who like to play the game simply because they are looking for that one thing that will make them stay. They just don’t believe in the lifestyle of being single until a ‘one and only’ comes knocking, and you shouldn’t judge them for that.

We would love to provide you with a manual on how to keep safe from a player, but really the only tip that you should try and listen to is that you should play the game with them. Hey, if they are attractive, make you laugh, make you feel confident and good then what’s the reason for knowing what date you should put on the wedding invitation? You could just wait for the marriage proposal you know; like it’s normal to do.

Don’t be scared of the player, learn from them, and play with them because you know that there’s always a lot more fun in a game when there are two people playing.

Author: S. L. Robb

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