I’ve been thinking about love lately.
When does one say ‘I love you’? Why does one say it? Three little words, so beautiful, so simple yet they mean so much… Most people say them because they really mean them. They really do have so many feelings for another person that just can’t be explained otherwise. It must be love.
Late at night, just before you fall asleep, you whisper ‘I love you’ hoping that your chosen one will hear you, or even more, say it back. Hoping they feel the same way you do. Hoping you’ve chosen the right time to say those special words.
But sometimes, not everyone says ‘I love you’ just because they actually really do mean it. Sometimes, the road ahead between a couple might not look good, so one tries to sweeten the other up before the storm hits. Sometimes they might want something done and will try to manipulate one another by saying they love them. Or they may even be feeling guilty about something they did and are trying to compensate with expressing their ‘love’.
But is it really love? Let’s say we do use these special words to manipulate our other half. What are the reasons for this sort of behaviour? And why would we put up with it? Why would we accept this love?
For a man:
He tells you he loves you to keep you there, close to him; to keep your eyes only on him. Sometimes for the right reasons and sometimes for the wrong reasons. He may, honest to god, love you and mean every word he says. But, on the other hand, he may not. He may be hiding something and only tells you he loves you to keep you from looking and finding what he is getting up to behind your back.
Knowing that every woman wants to hear those three little words, if he doesn’t mean them, a guy can say them just like that. He can blurt them out whenever and wherever just to keep you sweet. To manipulate you into thinking that he really means them.
So, just imagine, he has gone and done the worst possible thing he could ever do to you. Think about that for a minute. Now think of the conversation that follows once you find out. There’s screaming and shouting on your part as he calmly tries to find his way out of it. ‘But I love you’ he says, expecting it to act as an automatic cure for whatever pain he caused you and you to say it back.
But you don’t. And when you don’t he starts to get angry, realising that he might actually lose you. And that if you do leave him he will have to start all over again, looking for a girl that will fall in love with him so that he can still enjoy the intimacy of a relationship yet still take part in his ‘evening’ activities. Would a guy who truly loves you do that?
For a woman:
The woman who truly loves her partner will say ‘I love you’ because she wants him to do something for her; probably something she can’t do herself and does actually need her man’s help. She will say I love you to show her appreciation. But the woman who is not in love can be ruthless.
She will use those three little words to manipulate a man who is in love with her. She will manipulate him into doing anything for her. She doesn’t feel the same way he does and that is how she can trick him into doing Whatever she wants him to do.
So why in this modern age do so many people use these special words to manipulate their other half? The one they supposedly love and respect? And also, why do we accept it? Or even, why do we do it?
In the end, I guess it’s just not real love.