In the beginning there is love.
Passion is born every time he looks into your eyes and, in his, your image reflects more beautiful, radiant and happy. He rocks your world and brightens your day, just by staring at you for a while. In a flash, words become inessential between the two of you.
You quickly learn to read his mind and heart just by looking back at his adorable face. So many beautiful things are hidden there; from all the words of love he shies away from, to his most secret thoughts and the peace and serenity you have been desperately seeking from before meeting him.
Time literally flies. Days, months and years pass in the blink of an eye, full of the kind of magic moments that become memories of a lifetime. And every time that something scares or distresses you he is always there for you. His handsome, soulful face that never lies to you, not even once, soothes your pain, beats your fears, keeps on “shouting” all these strong feelings and the deep, passionate love he has for you.
Then at some point –your mistake, I guess– you take this love for granted and turn your back on it. You stop searching in his eyes for some proof that he is still yours, your eternally love-struck soul mate and your everlasting one and only. Somehow, you feel sure that nothing would have changed. That there isn’t anything strong enough to fade the affection you have been sharing ever since your first kiss.
But it seems that something always is.
At first, you start growing apart and, eventually, you aren’t trembling at the thought of losing him anymore. You can’t believe it and you can’t understand what has happened to make you feel this way. You, who used to think that the world would be a suffocating hell without him breathing by your side, are finally not scared of losing the touch of his skin. How did this happen – and why?
It surely isn’t because you don’t love him anymore, because –God damn it!– you still do. It is because of the many little things that have come between you and him all those years. Because the time you used to spend with him was reduced dramatically and because there were countless times when uncertainty and stupid disagreements made you act like enemies. It is basically because at some point you became an ego tripper and neglected him. And it is then, all of a sudden, that you get the feeling that life has been tearing you and him apart.
For so long you have been turning your gaze elsewhere when your eyes met. Even now that you know that something is wrong, you stubbornly try to avoid looking into his eyes. Are you afraid or are you just playing it cool? It doesn’t matter anyway, because when you finally look at him, only a distorted, tired, sad reflection of yours looks back at you; and you are utterly shocked. You desperately search for signs of emotion on his face but it seems to be really late, since the only thing dwelling there is the closure he has been struggling to hide – the goodbye he has never found the courage to tell you.
“I love you”, you want to shout now, but something holds you back. It’s this unsaid goodbye that scares you, the one lingering on his lips, the one hiding in his eyes. Why? Why haven’t you turned to him before? How will you reach his soul now? Is it really worth it?
If your heart still beats fast for him, then you know that it is. Search deep in you, put your ego aside for once and whisper to him “Please, don’t go, please don’t say goodbye yet.”