On that night, she returned home and, right before going to bed, she had a long hot shower. She spent half an hour washing her whole body over and over again; especially the parts where he had touched her. Ritually, she scratched that soap so hard over the places which had been kissed by him – in a desperate attempt to wash her guilt away as well. And as the water flowed down the drain, she realized what she had done. Catching herself smiling in the nearby bath mirror, she came up with the realization that not only did she enjoy what she did, but the best -or worst- part of it is that she couldn’t care less about the consequences of her actions.
It was the first time in a very long time that she felt so liberated, so carefree. Despite making love to another guy an hour ago, she was thirsty for more. And so, she uncovered the duvets playfully asking her man the unexpected in spite of the late hour. Two hours later, she found herself lying on that pillow and staring the ceiling with an extreme satisfaction running through her veins.
Has she regretted sleeping with another man? No, she hasn’t. She will probably do it again, soon.
Will she tell the man that is now peacefully snoring next to her? Of course she won’t.
Her partner is her safety net, her comfort zone. He is the one that she is most likely to marry, the one who’s the most promising candidate for becoming the father of her children. There’s no way in hell she’s ever going to dump him. For what is a woman without a man by her side, right? A single woman is one without worth, without a purpose — or so some say. The only road to happiness in this life is to always have someone by your side. It doesn’t matter if the two of you don’t get along. It doesn’t matter if the game has been over for a long time; you just have to continue being in this cheap excuse of a relationship. Single life equals an unhappy, miserable life.
My dear ones, you ought to know that the past three paragraphs come into total contrast with my beliefs – they simply narrate someone else’s mindset. Disappointingly, this someone is not a single person but rather a bunch of them. Day by day, their numbers increase and, gradually, they have created a tribe – the tribe of the cheaters. Those self-loathing, weak and arrogant type of people who ignore the fact of how hurtful it is to be unfaithful. They are just freaks who get high on the idea of having a secret affair and get overdosed with adrenaline just by the thought that they might get caught red-handed.
You know, I have always wondered. This planet is literally as old as time, yet through the ages historians and archaeologists make discoveries of more and more things that have lasted over the centuries. Take for example the pyramids or even the Parthenon. How come those ancient building have managed to last for an eternity? Apparently, those who built them had put a lot of thought and effort into their planning, mechanics and construction. Thought and effort – that’s what makes relationships successful and everlasting; and buildings as it seems.
Those two elements are the missing pieces from a cheater’s life. Thought for when it comes to contemplating the effects of their actions and lack of effort in keeping what they already have.
Being with someone for an awfully long time is no excuse for finding comfort into someone else’s arms. Neither is routine an acceptable excuse for cheating. When you really want to be with someone you work at it, you don’t make excuses, despite how bad things may get. And when you are unhappy, you do something about it. Then again, if you have stated of how miserable you are by your partner’s side, and they still do not do something about it, you break up.
It’s quite simple actually, you stay loyal or you stay single. If you regard being faithful as a feat, you break up and that’s the end of it. Distractions and temptations will always be out there to test and bring you to your limits, but the whole point of being in a committed relationship with someone is that you remain focused on the same person throughout the years. It’s all about falling in and out of love over and over again; with the one you share breakfast with. Every. Single. Day.
Honestly, how would you feel if you were the one being cheated on? Would you take the fact that the one that you love has betrayed you, not once, but so many more times, lightly? If you are disgusted only by the idea of it, why do you keep doing it then? When you really care for someone, you also care about their happiness too. With you cheating on them, happiness is nowhere near; not even close. If you really love them, you ought to set them free in order for them to find themselves someone who truly loves them and does not disrespect them. Because being cheated on is definitely disrespectful.
And if you find it so hard to let go, just because you are afraid of being alone, I reckon that it is high time that you had a serious conversation with yourself. I bet there’s someone who’s just a bit too frightened of dealing with themselves and realizing that they’re far too weak to stand on their own and come face to face with the ugly reality of loneliness. But honey, loneliness isn’t as bad as it seems. It’s better to be lonely than to be with someone who fucks around behind my back when I’m not around.
Eyes that commit, that’s all that I want.