janedali28062020

We are all free people. We live in a free world. We are free to speak our minds, to express ourselves however we want to. We are free to live however we want and, the majority of the times, without giving any explanations to anyone. People should have the right to say whatever they want; to a certain point, that is.

It is one of the most fundamental rights. It’s something that is even written in almost every country’s Constitution. We all are entitled to our rights, but we should know the difference between right and wrong. What I mean is, people should know the difference between being rude and supporting their opinion. But what happens when someone takes advantage of that right? Or when they cross the fine line that there is between saying your opinion and offending someone. Why some people don’t realize that difference? Or maybe they do realize it, but they act like this intentionally.

Words have a power of their own. We should wisely, and very carefully, choose the words that come out of our mouths. Words can be scary and can trigger people and they can easily leave a negative or positive imprint in them. Our words have the power to hurt people but also make someone love us more.

I often wonder why people are so rude sometimes. It’s just an expression of their opinion when they use phrases like “Oh, you’ve gained weight!” like you haven’t seen yourself in the mirror lately. Why would you say something like this to someone! Ok, let’s say that you shouldn’t take things like that personally, etc etc, but what happens when someone mistakes kind criticism and starts being critical and offends you?

Is there a “positive” way to express your opinion about someone?

Yes, there is. It’s called kindness. Just be kind. Before you offer criticism, consider the reason that you do it and choose your words wisely. Everyone can criticize, tell whatever the hell is on their minds without caring about what others feel or say. Think carefully about what you want to say and the words to express it first and then open your mouth.

People don’t take criticism very well, even if it is made for good reasons. So, if you are not going to do it right, don’t do it at all. It’s better to suggest something rather criticize, it’s better to focus on someone’s positive aspects rather than the negatives and it’s certainly better to never criticize the person but their actions in order not to hurt them, intentionally or unintentionally.

On the other hand we must learn to appreciate and not take personally a critic that someone gives us. If it is made from someone that really cares and loves us we should just say thank you and stay positive. And if the critic is hurtful or insulting just ignore all your negative feelings and stay above the attack, because the only person that is going to be hurt again it is just you.

Overall, if a critic is constructive it can make you be better as a person. But if it is made to hurt you and it’s invalid or it is just mean, you should learn to shake it off and ignore it.

Criticism -a good criticism- is something that requires skills to do it right or accept it well. We mustn’t forget that we all have flaws and nobody is perfect. And as we all use our freedom of speech in our everyday lives, let’s be friendly and kind, it doesn’t cost much.

Author: Jane Dali

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