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When it comes to sex, a lot of theory isn’t at all necessary. Sex is supposed to be something that comes from right inside you. And it is supposed to happen when and where you want it. Without many words, thoughts and planning.  

Spontaneous sex is intriguing, fun and exciting. It is intense and it is absolutely intoxicating to know that someone cannot stand not having you right then and there. It instantly makes you feel beautiful, sexy and desirable. You turn from a typical, everyday woman to a sex symbol like -let’s say- Monica Bellucci in the blink of an eye. And that sky rockets your libido.  

Spontaneous sex is the kind of sex we see and envy in the movies. It involves adrenaline at its highest, loads of sexual rush and tons of passion. It transforms the two lovers into naughty children or partners in crime. Feeling unable to restrain yourself and hold your sexual urge is incredibly sexy. There is nothing better than going for it; and just doing it. You experience an intercourse in its core form that way. No thinking, no planning. Nothing can compete with that. It is hot, hot, hot. Period.

But unfortunately, couples of the real world do not live in movies. They lead busy lives full of tight schedules and obligations that absorb most of their energy. They may have really demanding careers or kids living with them. And – for the love of god! – they do not always wander around shower-fresh and perfectly waxed with impeccable hair and in their best underwear. They are not constantly feeling sexy and wanted. And they are not always in the mood to have sex at an instant. This is something perfectly natural and normal.   

That is where planned sex jumps in. Ok, we have admitted it. Spontaneous sex may be the first best thing. But when it is completely out of the question, you can still have a great sexual life. Think of it that way. Sex on schedule is still sex. And that is always better than no sex at all. Trust me. You can make it work.  

Many people tend to think if you plan it, sex will be as bland and boring as household chores or a typical business appointment. But, scheduled sex doesn’t necessarily mean bad sex. It can still be very hot and yummy. And it also comes with a lot of its own benefits. For one thing, it creates a lot of anticipation that boosts your sex drive. It also gives you the appropriate time to get ready for it both physically and mentally. To look and feel at your best. Maybe not exactly like Monica of course, but still at your very best. And it also helps you let all cares and worries aside, before going for it. So, you can enjoy it and take pleasure in every moment.  

Also, let’s not forget about the atmosphere. When you plan it you can also create the best sexual atmosphere that works for you both. You can make it more wild or romantic or whatever you fantasize of. It gives you much more time and flexibility for foreplay and many hugs and kisses as a dessert.

So, if and when you can have it spontaneously, just do it. But, when it becomes hard to do that, remember you can still have fun if you go ahead and plan it. Don’t hesitate to schedule some dating nights and give some special time to your partner. Whether spontaneous or planned, sex can always be great as long as you do consider it as a game for two rather than some duty.   

Author: Sofia Argyriadou

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