Spending your Summer Single

So, summer. Unless you’ve been living under a rock without wifi access, you might have noticed a pattern in your social media newsfeed. Focus on the photos of hot girls in tiny bikinis. Move past drooling over them (if you’re a dude) and hating their guts because they have a thigh gap and you don’t (if you’re a girl). See anything interesting? No? Let me point it out for you; until about a couple of months ago, they were flooding their profiles with photos and check-ins of how happy they’re with their bae. Now they all look single and ready to mingle. Coincidence?

Of course not – if you thought so, you’re clearly reading the wrong column.

See, just before the heatwave, there’s another natural phenomenon that rolls in; the summer breakup wave. Cuffing season is over. The demand for spooning and cuddle buddies is at an annual low. As serotonin and dopamine levels rise, so does the libido. Everybody wants a fresh, passionate fling. People wake up from their wintertime slumber and start going out to social shindigs again, meeting new and interesting people they’d probably love to tangle with.

Suddenly hunkering down, watching TV series and having brunches with your significant other sounds really dull. Hell, your significant other himself (or herself, I am obliged to add) sounds dull. You’re unsatisfied with what you settled for back in autumn – you’d rather spend your time free to sow your wild oats. So you shed the burden of commitment (and along with that, the poor fucker) and rush headlong into a summer promising wild parties and fiery affairs.

I’m not one to judge. Go, have at it, live your life. We may even be lucky enough to stumble upon each other – imagine that! Keep in mind one thing, though; as the Starks say, winter is coming. Before long, it’s gonna be sweater weather all over again and you’ll find yourself wanting for a snugglemate to spend the cold nights with. And if you expect to find one among the beach boys (or girls; still obliged to add) you had hot nights with, you might want to think again.

The thing with fleeting flames, see, is exactly that; they’re fleeting. By the time you look for someone to settle down with, they’ll be long gone – it’s always wham, bam, thank you ma’am with them. Somehow the type of person you ditched back in May starts looking like a real catch again, instead of boring and vanilla. So plan accordingly while the weather’s still favorable, because come first rainfall your precious freedom will be moot. Banging’s all fine and dandy, you see, until one day the only thing that’s banging is loneliness – and its banging its fist on your door.

Alright, I may be one to judge, after all. Dump a caring partner in spring, have a wild summer, find a caring partner in autumn, have a quiet winter, rinse and repeat. It’s a selfish and shallow way of life, but if you’re in your early twenties, that may be alright – you’re almost supposed to be selfish and shallow.

But what if you’re older?

What if, after years of living like that, you still can’t realize that an alternating string of passionless winters and meaningless summers is not exactly a fulfilling existence? Food for thought.

Anyhow, I don’t mean to end in a sour note or rain on your parade. Have a great summer. Swim, eat, drink, make love, fuck, live life the way you want. I just have one thing to tell you – though I’m aware that I begin to sound like an HBO commercial;

Winter is coming.