The devious game behind a Power Play

Power play. That sweet feeling when you have someone under your thumb and all you want is to crush them, or play around with them; like a cat with its impending dinner, the poor and helpless mouse. But is it that sweet indeed? Is it really that nice to be in a position of power and exploit those beneath you, those that know that their paycheck, their career –their life, even– depends on how you woke up this morning and what kind of mood you are in?

Dear reader if the answer to the previous questions is “yes” then stop reading this and just get the hell out of here.

Because you are a fucked-up person.

People in positions of power tend in some –I would say many but I am trying to stay positive– cases to take advantage of their position and develop several ways to torture their subordinates. They tend to enjoy making their lives living hell, harass them, or even sexually assault them.

If this has happened to you, then you understand exactly what I am talking about. An implicit sexist comment, during late hours put in at the office, the promise of a promotion as an exchange for some “favors” – these are just some of the most obvious cases. The ones that many employees have experienced in their workspace; or, if not personally, they know of at least one colleague that has been served one of them. The threat of losing one’s job or being discredited –because who would believe an employee with no social status as opposed to the “high and mighty” boss– along with inherent issues of legitimacy in terms of sex, skin color or sexual preferences, make the issue more serious and worthy of close attention.

If I wanted to sugar coat it, I would say it makes the matter more complicated, but we all know there is more to it than that.

Power plays and taking advantage of one’s position to pursue one’s own agenda has more sides than the ones described above, but the idea is the same, and it is pervasive. We often read about military officers abusing those ranking beneath them, students being hazed by fraternity and sorority leaders as a ritual, heck; even bloggers being virtually flogged in their online communities for voicing a different opinion.

I am pretty sure many of you have thought that in cases of sex all this does not apply because everything is allowed in bed, right? Well, it is not exactly like that. One of the most problematic things, for example, with 50 Shades of Gray is that it confused many readers, who thought that the depicted bondage and BDSM scenes were a good representation of how these “kinks” are supposed to work.

However dearest readers, in such endeavors, it is fundamental that every action is consensual. In bed, no matter what kind of thing is your cup of tea, you should always have a safe word, and excellent communication to avoid any kind of complications. Ergo, if that word is heard, everything comes to a halt. And it doesn’t count as consensual if you aren’t into it as well – you should not allow someone to coerce you, make you feel that you have no choice, or even try to persuade you that “this is simply how things are done.”

In your workspace, if someone harasses you, there is no such thing as novelty. Sue their asses, and sue them hard; just as hard as they wanted to screw you. Seek help, counsel, and never, even for a second, think that you deserve it.

Because you don’t. You never do.