Most women, upon finding out that there is another woman in the picture, become inconsolable. They cry, they scream, they break things, they fall into depression, they become angry with their man; and/or even with the “other woman”. It doesn’t matter if it’s a marriage, a relationship, or if you’re dating a guy and you suddenly find out that, in his mind, you two were never exclusive, so it was more than fine that he sew his oats elsewhere as well.
Sweetheart, I’m not that kind of woman. I won’t fight you for him. You can have him. I’m not one to get my hands dirty and he’s not worth the jail time. I’ll even give you my blessing. I can be the bigger person like that.
I don’t want you feeling bad for me either. In my mind, there is no such thing as someone getting between a couple in love. Nope. If another person fits between them, then one of the two has made enough room for them to slide their way in.
And I wasn’t the one making space. So if he stepped aside, even just slightly, and let you in, honey, go ahead and stay. But I’ll be going. Three’s a crowd and, you know, I’m claustrophobic and all.
I care for him deeply, love him even, but obviously it’s only me. And what’s the point of fighting for something when you’re all in and the other person has one foot out the door? You can’t force someone to care for you, or love you back, and you can put in all the effort for two for only so long.
A little warning though, and listen closely because it’s coming from a veteran; if he did it to me, he’ll do it to you. I hate to break it to you, you may be a great girl, the perfect lady with the finest ass(ests) on the planet and all, but, as far as he’s concerned, you’re no different from any of the others he’s got written down in his little black book.
I have no doubt that you’re special and that you have innumerable gifts –apparent as well as hidden. But who doesn’t? Every woman thinks the same, and being that I’ve been in your shoes –just as some poor thing was in mine before the tables turned– I’ll give you a few pointers; because not every person on this earth has the same good grace as me.
Take notes of all the little things he does with you now. All those little things he says to you presenting them as if “it’s best for both of us if…” or “It’s not in my character to…” That’s not it; that’s not his issue. He’s hiding you, and he’s not going to say it to your face, because, as cruel as this might seem, he’s not going to leave one sure thing if the next isn’t lined up and waiting. And he wants to make sure he’s got you where he wants you before he leaves me.
You think that I don’t realize that it’s you texting him and not his third cousin’s husband’s boss? You think that I buy his bullshit that he’s working late – again? And sweetie, what do you think it means that he only calls you at certain times and will only agree to go out with you, to some tiny bar in the middle of nowhere, on a certain night of the week, after 12? Why do you think you’ve never seen the inside of his place?
Does he make you feel like a queen? Like he’s staring at the goddess Aphrodite in all her glory? Does he make you feel like you’re on top of the world? Does he tell you that you just might be the best thing that’s ever happened to him?
Well it’s all bullshit, part of his process, one that is flawless and has worked numerous times.
I could go on, get into details and explain every step he’ll take from here on, but I’ll let you live your romance and oblivious bliss for as long as you want to. I have nothing against you and that “first month” phase with him is something else. I know.
I wish we could talk more, I’m sure I’d probably like you if we’d met under other circumstances, but you’ll have to excuse me; I still have work to do so as to complete his fantasy. I have to go play my role as a scorned woman.
And sweetie, guard your head and your heart, please. I’d hate to see you bust the first to pieces when he drops you from the little cloud you’re on and the latter when he leaves you there on the side of the road without a sideways glance.
So, I’m just going to bow out, with my head still up high and in tact and take a seat here on the sidelines. Karma’s a bitch and I can’t wait to see what she has in store for him when the scales tip against him.