We met under the strangest and most difficult of circumstances. It was one of those introductions you normally don’t expect will last, or evolve into something more; yet it did, if just for a while. I am looking at how we were a few months back and I can’t believe how we ended up like this. We’ve been through hell and we were supposed to make it. We are still in love with each other; both of us, but there’s always something stopping you, forcing you to turn around and leave. Remember when we felt that if we have each other, we want nothing more in our life? Well, I still feel that way.
You know you are one of those people whom, even though you don’t know all that much about, you feel you have a deeper connection with. As if the two of us had met in a past life. You are the man I have been dreaming of, but it just so happened that you came at the wrong time and you made everything right; you came at what seemed like the worst time for me and you fixed me. You helped me up, you shook me and opened my eyes; you made me face issues I refused to touch and you forced me to act. You didn’t have to do anything; you just said the right words, but now you are gone.
You keep asking how could I have felt so much for you in such a short time. Well, how couldn’t I? You barely knew me and you saw right through me. Our first talk was about how I felt. I didn’t have to speak; you knew everything. You described my thoughts and feelings perfectly without me uttering a word. For the first time in my life someone could read me without me having to speak or explain things; you knew simply because you’d been through roughly the same things.
How I got for granted all of your love and managed to turn it against me, I still don’t know. What I do know is that I am standing here all alone and you are gone. You mumbled something about living on with your life with a new girl. How can you when you are still in love with me? Is it a reaction to everything I’ve put you through? Is it you fighting your feelings?
I miss the times when you would just open your mouth and say how much you care; now, I live on the memories, trying to hold on. There’s no one else who could care more for you. I am the one; there’s a reason the both of us met the way we did, having been through everything we have. I refuse to believe that you just stopped feeling and you are walking away.
You are scared, I get it. I am too. I am not used to someone loving me the way I love them. I am not used to someone taking care of me the way you did. So, I got scared and I screwed everything up and then I scared you and made you believe that it was all a lie.
Nothing was a lie. I am still here, still waiting for you to come back. I will wait for you for as long as it takes. You are my other half – I used to mock expressions like that – without you everything seems dull and completely boring. You brought colour and joy to my life and I made yours so much more fun.
Remember all of our late night talks? All of our good mornings? The times we woke up next to each other looking like mess on the outside but feeling so happy, about to explode of happiness on the inside?
I still live on those memories and I refuse to move one, because a love like ours cannot just vanish into thin air. I refuse to let anyone else come close to me. I don’t want to. I want you. I am still yours; body and mind. I will always be and I will wait for you if that is the last thing I do.
I miss you like hell and I know you do too. So, don’t let the years pass us by, don’t just live on. Come back and work this with me. Come back so that both of us live happily ever after. That’s how fairy tales end, why not us? Why not, after everything we’ve been through?
So, I am here waiting for you.
I will wait for you no matter what.