Yellow light shades filled the four corners of the room as I checked the cards I was holding in my hands. I had gracefully won the round again. Infuriated by their loss, the couple sitting opposite me dropped the cards in the center of the round table and the man immediately lit a cigarette. With the woman scanning me suspiciously as I was gathering my winnings, I noticed how they were both dressed in black; reminding me of secret service agents. Little did they resemble the iconic duo of “Men in Black” though.
Besides their outfits, what caught my undivided attention with those two, were the comfortable silences they used to share in between them, and how they preferred to communicate with their eyes only. My initial assumption was that they must have been together for a very long time. And as I had been told, they did actually – from the very first sunrise that this earth had ever seen.
Their names were Time and Timing.
Despite having this encounter a while ago, it was brought back to my memory recently, after hearing people here and there referring to the concept of timing and how it affects their lives. After our little game together, and having gotten the chance to see them together, let me tell you this: Timing was the female of that couple and she is the ultimate bitch. I know, because I’ve met her once upon a dream. Frankly, she is so manipulative and meaner than you’d ever expected her to be.
Like a puppet theater, she’s the lady behind the scenes that moves the threads that are attached to the dolls. The not so entertaining part in real life though, is that we are her puppets. In a close collaboration with Time, they take control of our entire lives. Comparing the two of them, I’ll say that they complete each other – that’s why they make the perfect couple. What Timing destroys in her whims, Time comes in turn to heal. This woman’s hobby is simple, to always mess feelings and fuck ideal situations up.
She has this idiotic habit of bringing people together who, in spite of being right for each other, are not ready to be each other’s lives. She enjoys of witnessing the result of people’s nerves shattering as she postpones urgent matters. Being an immortal, I somehow justify her for doing all these things. How else is she going to spend the rest of the eternity do you think? Forever is indeed a long time and a little laugh every now and then, never hurt anyone. If only she realized the trouble, the pain, the restless nights that she has been causing – only then would she stop fooling around with our lives behind our backs. Only if she could experience the amount of confusion that we get every time she decides to intervene.
Unfortunately, in my case, Timing has never been on my side. And I’m not saying that just so you feel sorry for me, but because it is the truth. When things go bad, they can go from the worst to total shit in the blink of an eye. And when things are good, they don’t last that way for that long. So, when life becomes pretty good for a decent amount of time, I become extremely suspicious, waiting for it to turn miserably unlucky again. Known as the “Cactus” among my friends, I can never really enjoy the moment for I’m scared that the minute I rest, shall be the last of it.
“You are perfect for the position. However, there is no available vacancy at the moment.” The interviewer on my dream job company remarked with a pressed smile and my hopes were crushed instantly like a shuttered glass.
“You are just fine. It’s not you, it’s me. I’m just not ready to have a relationship yet.” The guy I used to talk to at the university said to me at a Friday pre-drinking party; and I had no other choice but to get blindly drunk in order to surpass this too.
Have you any idea of what it’s like to be given chances and not to be able to seize them? Do you honestly know how frustrating is it to have people entering your life and not being able of being with them just because the timing is not fucking right? But timing is never right with me, what am I supposed to do?
She’s testing me I’m telling you, I know she is. Throughout the years she keeps throwing all these obstacles at me and each time I demolish them.
Trust me, it doesn’t get any easier, I just got stronger. And no matter how much she wishes to see me fail, I simply won’t allow it. I have too many motherfuckers to prove wrong; and Timing is one of them. I know what I want and I won’t stop until I get it. It might take me a month, it might take me ten years but eventually I will make it. It is a fact that you cannot rush something that you want to last forever and that is why the amount of the time that it will be needed in order to accomplish things does not bother me as much. Wait and you will see.
One day, the timing will be right – it owes it to me anyway for all the trouble she has put me through. All the missing pieces will finally fall into their rightful place. For now, I just have to laugh at the confusion once more and patiently wait for the day of the victory. Everything I want is on its way. They are just waiting for me on the other side of that bridge.
But first, there’s a second round of poker I must win.